Hello Everyone,
I'm addressing this blog in hopes of gaining a following but that isn't the reason why I'm starting this blog. I guess I'm writing it for the same reason why most people do or one of the reasons why. I don't really believe that I have something to say that no one has said before but I'm doing this because I need a release. I'm sitting here close to midnight on a Saturday feeling lonelier than ever. And like most people I have this need to verbally or physically express things that I can't seem to get over and run over and over in my head. And nowadays those things are pretty numerous.
To catch everyone up to speed on my life a little more than 2 months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 and half years. After that break up I entered a friends with benefits relationship with a guy that I worked with and I broke the number one rule and fell for him, so now that is also over. After about a year of living on my own, I had to move back into my parents house because of break up #1. And I guess one of the biggest things that I'm dealing with is the ever drawing nearer date of my graduation from college. I'm out 6 weeks out from that. And while I'm excited to be done with school, I feel like I'm more lost than ever of what I want to do. And the fact that I'm writing this blog is going to make the next thing I say sound even funnier - I'm so over writing. To explain this a little more, when I graduate I will have 2 majors, Professional and Creative Writing and because of these two majors and the fact that I'm doing both of them in about 2 1/2 years, I've grown tired of writing. Of expressing myself in non-clique ways, in new ways, of thinking of plots, characters and giving a fuck of what people think about my work. I'm over doing it for someone else.
While I am excited about the act of graduation, I'm not excited about what comes afterwards - finding the job. I honestly do not feel like I'm a good enough writer to get a job, in this economy, as a writer or an editor or anything that could easily be done with my majors. But I do feel like I have a future with my present job - I work at a hotel as the Front desk clerk/agent/receptionist. I really enjoy my job and meeting new people and almost everyday it makes me wish that I would have entered HTM(hotel and tourism management) (The college that I attend, Purdue University is ranked very high in that major which would mean an even better and faster climb for me in the hotel business) but without that major it will take me longer and I wont reach as high. And of course, you may be thinking that I should just go back to school, spend another 4 years and about $40,000 to get that major. But honestly the idea of explaining that to a senior in college who see the finish line clearly is in information falling on deaf ears. I'm just ready to be done and I guess I'll just figure things out afterwards.
So that's a little intro into my life and all the things that I'm dealing with and that are consuming my thoughts.
Goodnight everyone,
